Funniest dating ads

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If you enjoy having a man make you dinner, a man who will sweep you off your feet, treat you to the world of never ending respect, with adventure, humor, kindness, relaxation, and love mixed in for a solid foundation, than perhaps you are the queen for me.The Knight requests a Queen who will dress to impress. If I sound interesting or you have a wish to find the man of your dreams, look no further, your Knight in shining armour has arrived." Self Confidence - pick yourself up with this God centred guide to learning to love yourself as you are in God the way HE made you!I'll be at the front door when you get home from work, Call (xxx) xxx-xxxx and ask for Daisy.""Male Seeking Female, 28 years old, 6’ 4” tall.This knight in shining armour is seeking an audience with the queen.The report also found that 33% of all online relationships led to a date.- The Sunday Times, Innovations, 17-1-1999 Wikipedia on personals ads.Below are some of the worlds funniest personal ads placed in real publications and we will be adding more as and when we find them.Over the years there have been countless thousands of daft, silly and downright hilarious personals postings for love and we've found a few from the Internet and complied them here for your enjoyment!

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Hope you enjoy these, or maybe get some inspiration! I am safe and sane ( I know you are questioning that about now)."HOW GREAT IS THAT?! With you, however, I’m going to be a belligerent old shit from the very beginning.That’s because I like you and feel ready to give you honesty.Some willingness to assist with basic bodily functions required." "Bitter, unsuccessful middle aged loser wallowing in an unending sea of inert, drooping loneliness looking for 24 year old needy leech-like hanger-on to abuse with dull stories, tired sex and Herb Alpert albums." "I like eating mayonnaise and peanut butter sandwiches in the rain, watching Barney Miller reruns, peeing on birds in the park and licking strangers on the subway; you eat beets raw, have climbed Kilimanjaro, and sweat freely and often.Must wear size five shoes." "When I was thirty my dates had to be young, tall, handsome, rich, intelligent.

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