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Whether you’re arguing over politics, religion, or even the merits of VH-1’s Celebreality lineup, an argument on a first date never feels like a good sign. If you’re arguing, it can mean there’s passion between you.Sparks are flying—sure, maybe not in the way you’d hoped, but they’re still there.“It felt like we couldn’t see eye-to-eye on anything that first date,” he recalls. An hour-long debate on animal rights ensued.” Despite the meat melee, their connection was still meaty enough to merit a second date.“She was my opposite, sure, but being with her was never boring,” he says.“It probably means this person likes you a whole lot,” she says, “and might need a few dates to get past their jitters.” When your date is super-nervous, put him or her at ease by being deliberate and calm yourself.Take a few deep breaths, smile, and make eye contact.“I wanted to leave instantly, but I had agreed to dinner and didn’t want to be rude,” she says.

When your date is grilling you, attempt to turn it around and ask some questions of your own. If you have a second date, Mac Leod suggests catching a movie. The elements that are making your date a disaster could actually signal something much sweeter. It turns out that it’s all a matter of perspective.“She just kept asking me question after question—where I was from, what my favorite ice-cream flavor was, where I wanted to be in five years,” he says.“It was really uncomfortable, and it was hard to feel a vibe or any sparks over all the interview speak.” If your date spends the whole time you’re together shooting questions at you rapid-fire and giving you the hard sell, it could just mean that he or she is impressed by you and is simply trying too hard, says Mac Leod.

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